Real Self-Care: Beyond the Bubble Bath

Reflect on the pressures of the wellness industry and how it can lead to self-shaming. Identify a self-care 'thing' you do and ask 'why am I doing this?' This action promotes critical thinking about self-care motivations.

“Wellness has given us methods and tools but it has not given us principles or perspective.”

Learn about the origins of self-care in both social justice movements and psychiatric practices. This action aims to broaden the understanding of self-care beyond individual practices.

“Self-care is self-preservation.”

Understand that real self-care is not about the 'thing' but the internal work you do before doing the 'thing'. Focus on the principles and perspective. This action emphasizes the importance of intention and understanding in self-care.

“Real self-care is not a thing to do; it's a way to be.”

Understand that a boundary doesn't always mean saying no. Focus on responding instead of reacting. This action encourages a nuanced understanding of boundary setting.

“The boundary doesn't always mean saying no.”

Answer the five questions that help assess where you are on the scale of boundaries, power, and values. This assessment helps users evaluate their current boundary practices.

“Do I feel motivated to tackle my tasks or am I overwhelmed or am I apathetic?”

Reflect what anger, irritability, victimhood/lack of thankfulness, and fantasies of escape appear in your day. This journaling exercise helps users identify signs of lacking boundaries.

“The person that doesn't have boundaries is uh constantly feeling like they are managing their life as opposed to living their life.”

Begin with low-stakes risks, focusing on self-care activities like sitting down to eat lunch or drinking water during the workday. This action promotes gradual implementation of boundaries.

“You want to start small, you want to start small and so that means actually not with your family.”

Visualize the sushi train metaphor to understand guilt is just one thought among many. Practice tolerating the guilt that arises when setting boundaries. This action introduces cognitive defusion techniques to manage guilt.

“Guilt is not something that is it doesn't need to be our moral compass.”

Identify and list individuals who provide you with emotional support, practical help, and social connection. This is an important first step in becoming more socially supported.

“Humans are wired for connection, and social support is a cornerstone of resilience and self-care.”

Make an effort to contact one person from your support system and engage in a meaningful conversation. Schedule a phone call, meet for coffee, or send a thoughtful message. This focuses on establishing and maintaining a connection.

“A simple 'hello' can be the bridge to a deeper connection. Take the first step towards nourishing your relationships.”

Explore opportunities to join a community or group that aligns with your interests, values, or goals. This will expose you to new people and support networks.

“Communities provide a sense of belonging, shared experiences, and a platform for growth.”